They say that love overcomes hate and not hatred that overcomes hate. So I ask you, do you want to hate or do you wanna love?
**
When you fall for someone, the natural tendency is to rate them perfect(for example 25 is perfect). We have the natural tendency to not see the flaws in a person and so we just proceed with the idea that he/she is perfect. But then you start realizing them. One after another comes out, and you start deducting his/her "points". And then you realize that there is no more points left to deduct, and so you you stay away from them and you repeat the whole cycle again to another person.
how tragic is this. Why are humans this way? Shouldn't we start from 1 and work our way up to 25? Why can't we just do a lil more research and take a bit of our time to just understand that person? That is one reason why best friend of the opposite sex tend to fall for each other. They never realize that they were counting the bottom way up. That is why some of their relationships work for a long time.
**
Life is like a piece of paper. Our actions are like pens. And life time chances are like flipping to a new page even though the current one is not done. Every step you take is written down. You can't erase them, nor can you forget them. But sometimes you get life changing chances. Where you get to flip to a new page without continuing the previous one and you get to start on a whole new page. See, life is continuous. You don't get to suddenly stop it, you don't get to suddenly pause it. And the end of your life is like the end of the book. You can't continue it cause there is no pages left for you to write. Coming back to the life changing chances. There times where your doing something, could be anything(nothing in particular), and then you realize that what your doing now is gonna make you regret in the future. Its like your writing down on your book of life. You come to a point where you feel that you have wrote something wrongly and you wanna start a new. But how are you gonna start a new when you are already half way writing about something else? Lets just give an example.
You hate this person. No liking at all. And at that point, you were so certain that you were not gonna like him\her at any point in the future. You stress on how much you hated that person, and you tell most of the people around you that you hated that person so much that everything he\she does is annoying. So your writing down in your book of life, saying (I hate that person. Why do you always annoy me. Get a life puhlease.) So the writing continues. And then one day you find out, "hey, your actually kinda nice. All that I have thought was wrong. What used to be annoying is now charming". And you wanna start a new. But how are you gonna do that when your continuously writing it down? Maybe friends around you has never told him\her that you hated them. And there was no way for that person finding out that you hated them. So there you go. A new page has been flipped, and your now writing on how much you adore him\her. Your cherishing every moment with him\her. And he\she doesn't know you hated them. So that is a new page, not the same old page your continuing on. So treasure it.
But there are somethings that you can't start a new. Like people's opinion on you. Their perspective, their view, their own book of life. Now that's another story=). Stay tuned to find out more..hahaha
**
Today's value : To forgive, we must let go of the past. To forgive, we must transform hate to love. To forgive, makes you more superior, makes you the matured one. Makes you the wiser one.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Who defines it?
can you describe to me what defines love? Is it love, when you get close to someone and grow feelings for them, and somehow down the line, you stop loving them because of some misunderstanding? Or is that admiring, like, look up to, appreciate?
How do you know what is love just by feelings? If someone doesn't read about engineering, did not do any research on it, and suddenly declares to himself that he knows what engineering is all about because he had a feeling that he does. Does that actually makes him knowledgeable about engineering? If we have read about it, know what the actually meaning to it, then only can we say that we know what it is. What if one day, after reading about love, you found out that love wasn't the right word to say to a boyfriend/girlfriend, would you then go to them and say "Opps, sorry, can I take back the world love and replace it with like? I like you?" or would you be so ashamed that you would not tell them and lie to him/her, or so called "protect" their feelings from the truth?
I now know that I wasn't knowledgeable enough to have used the word love, merely because at that time I was so drawn to feelings and affections, but I should have taken the time to have studied about what that word is. Have you ever thought to yourself whether love requires experience and understanding before saying it? So as for now, I will only say things that I have experience on(which I think there is very little)before saying.
**
Today's value : Do not believe in anything (simply) because you have heard it.
How do you know what is love just by feelings? If someone doesn't read about engineering, did not do any research on it, and suddenly declares to himself that he knows what engineering is all about because he had a feeling that he does. Does that actually makes him knowledgeable about engineering? If we have read about it, know what the actually meaning to it, then only can we say that we know what it is. What if one day, after reading about love, you found out that love wasn't the right word to say to a boyfriend/girlfriend, would you then go to them and say "Opps, sorry, can I take back the world love and replace it with like? I like you?" or would you be so ashamed that you would not tell them and lie to him/her, or so called "protect" their feelings from the truth?
I now know that I wasn't knowledgeable enough to have used the word love, merely because at that time I was so drawn to feelings and affections, but I should have taken the time to have studied about what that word is. Have you ever thought to yourself whether love requires experience and understanding before saying it? So as for now, I will only say things that I have experience on(which I think there is very little)before saying.
**
Today's value : Do not believe in anything (simply) because you have heard it.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Confused and Clueless
Scolding after scoldings, advices after advices, im all confused about things. Can you just stop talking for a day? Just do me a favour for me to just have some time to think
**
And yet somethings are still poundering in my mind. Just let it go. I hope thoughts could liquidfy and just flow out of my head.
**
And yet somethings are still poundering in my mind. Just let it go. I hope thoughts could liquidfy and just flow out of my head.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Due date
Where do I start? Damn, there are so many thoughts in my mind right now and I don't know where to begin. But today, time is surprisingly on my side, so listing down everything shouldn't be a problem, now would it=)..haha
**
Lets see, lemme start from yesterday. Total freedom started yesterday cause my parents went to Singapore on that day. It was like one of a very very few times that day went on a holiday without my grandparents here(Malaysia, cause they are in Australia). Complete freedom. So I thought to myself, what would I do without their supervision.
Well, yesterday was a fun day. Forum ended quite early to my surprise. It ended at about 1 plus and my bus home would only leave college at 5.45, so I did some work[(sudden realization of the importance of studying)yea right..haha]. After doin for about 2 hours, I went to ssd and caught up with the guys. As usual played a bit of ping pong(really, I don't know why ping pong is like suddenly the in game. Everybody is starting to play it and we all really look super retarded playing the way we play in ping pong) to pass time by. That day my cousin was suppose to come to my house and for the 1st time go clubbing. Awesome ain't it=) haha. Then it got quite boring and my cousin was like "Do we have to wait this long for the bus? Why don;t we ask Denise to fetch us back since she is also fetching Vivien back". Then I'm like "We shouldn;t simply ask people to fetch us back larh. Not nice ok to ask people like that". But my cousin was like too bored so he went and ask Denise. And she was like "Can, but just needa chip in on the petrol=)".
So we left bout 3.30. The thing was that my parents were suppose to leave the house by the afternoon or so I heard. So by leaving at that time, I wasn't sure whether it was a good idea to drop at my house so early and my parents wondering how I got back. So I told Denise to lepak a bit before we go straight to my house. So we went for bubble tea. We asked for the oreo thingy campur dis and campur dat(super crazy). Den Vivien asked for malt oreo + extra oreo and I ordered vanilla malt oreo with extra oreo. So when the drink was ready, the lady passed Vivien's drink 1st and Vivi was like "Cool=)", den when the lady pass me mine, my cup was bigger than Vivi and Vivi went "WHAT? SO UNFAIR LARHHHH. WHY YOURS BIGGER DEN MINE?". How am I suppose to know kan. Sepatutnya same but the lady giv bigger so I'm like okayyyyyyy. Den Vivi was like "Blake, gimme some of yours. The lady sexist. Hahaha".
After bubble tea, we went to Bangsar to walk around. Went to this super cheap stationary shop which is technically a bookshop. The things there are like super cheap and you can't get any cheaper than this(oh and its the place where I bought the canvas board for her collage). So like we bought a lot of crap from there and left. Since we still had so much time, we went to Vivi's house. Denise let me drive to Vivi;s house after persuading her so banyak kali. Because she's so nice. Man I gotta tell you that Vivi's house is quite big. 4 dogs and the house looks like some kinda Zen or Yin Yang thingy with the botanic garden and all. Seriosly dam nice.
After dropping Vivi at her house, we went to my place. I brought Denise to my home and as soon as she stepped in my house, I was like "Denise....you are officially the 1st collage friend who has been in my house". Sad right, no one has come in my house=P..haha.
Basically what I was trying to say is that at least I didn't over use my freedom. But after that, my sis, her bf, my two couz and me went clubbing.
Girls there are kinda sporting. They don't mind dancing in front of the whole crowd, on stage and all. I'm a guy, so I was obviously looking at them la. But I was thinking, some of those girls looked kinda hot, and I would like to get to know them and all, but those are not the girls that I'm really interested in. Like I mean, I would just like to be friends with dem, talk to dem or so, but when it comes to something serious or what, they are not the ones that I look for. Until now, I don't know what girl I'm looking for. I know now that I shouldn't trust someone so easily and that is my weakest point, trusting someone too fast. Every girl that passed by me that day, got me thinking that I wasn't really exposed much to be trusting someone that easily. I kept thinking to myself that I should set some kinda standard when it comes to having a relationship. But the main puzzle which I still haven't figure out yet is what kinda girl do I want.
**
2nd day of freedom and I'm staying at home. I'm suddenly doin chores at home with out any one reminding me. I already did the 3rd badge of washing excluding doin the socks. What has happened to me? Suddenly I'm like good and I realized what I should be doing. One of the reasons why was that I wanted to prove to my parents that I'm responsible to do things even if they are not here to supervise me. I was practically trying to not make them worry and was trying to make them happy.
Well, one of the reasons that I had the sudden realization was that someone helped me in understanding how to concentrate and priorities. And one of the reasons why I asked that person in particular was that I could really express myself to him/her. I have never gotten really serious in front of anyone besides that person in collage before so I thought that that person could understand me and that person did. Usually guys have big egos, even I do. Mine is that I find it hard to accept when people try to teach me. EGO. STUPID EGO. But the thing is, when I'm having problems, that person is the only one I listen to with an open mind. No barriers are up when I hear that person's opinions and when that person tries to help me in suggesting ways to improve, I don't get hot tempered or anything. I'm just super calm and happy when that person gives me advices. That is why I like asking that person. I don't mind showing my fragile side to him/her because I know that him/her would not judge me as she/he knows who I am and that I was what I am at that moment was because of a slight ego.(slight tongue twister..haha).
**
When your alone and noise doesn't seem to be present, thats when your mind is at work. Concentration and determination. Day dreaming and thinking/reflecting is two completely different things. Its when your thinking that your at your most vulnerable state. What you think is the outcome of your feelings. Usually, when your in deep thinking, you tend to get sad and serious. That is because your thinking not only at the present, but also at the past and future. You think of consequences of actions and you think about love and hatred. Just a few hours ago, I was at a mamak alone, eating dinner and I was thinking. I was thinking, why do some people feel sad and serious and angry. And a thought occurred to me that most of the time people are sad and angry because of what they have been thinking. You see, happy thoughts come about when your thinking at the surface. The exterior, the skin, the looks. But when you get deep in, the flesh, the interior, you tend to get more serious. I'm not saying that every time you think deeply you will get angry of what, I'm just saying, most of the time people do get angry.
Sometimes when I think a lot, I tend to miss the feeling of being loved by a girlfriend. The feeling of comfort and the feeling of being wanted by another person. Getting to hold them in your arms and to feel special. A special hug. Technically its just a normal hug that you give to other person you hug, but the feeling changes when you hug someone you really love and you put your heart in that hug and you meant it fully. thats the feeling I miss. That tight squeezed hug, that warm feeling, the rising heart beat, that special someone.
**
The one who doesn't seek attention is the one who is wises. Sometimes I see people craving for attention and other times I see people who have the opportunity to get the attention but they don't want it. Those are the people I look up to, I envy, I admire. I want to be a person who doesn't need the attention. Occasionally I do, I mean its only human to want attention, but you don't have to want it every time. Are you that lack of attention? Why? You want people to notice you? Or you wanna attract someone? I believe that being humble, being nice, will in the end get you where you wanna go. That is one of the reasons why I get to write my opinions and thoughts in this blog because only a handful of people know about this blog. One handful. And thats all I need. Why do we need to post it somewhere so public for everyone to see? I mean I don't get it, but I'm open to receive any reasons. No more ego..so no worries=)..haha
Sorry for the extremely long post. 1st time this long..haha..just wanted to let out some thoughts which was stuck in my mind. Mind bottling. Haha.
**
Lets see, lemme start from yesterday. Total freedom started yesterday cause my parents went to Singapore on that day. It was like one of a very very few times that day went on a holiday without my grandparents here(Malaysia, cause they are in Australia). Complete freedom. So I thought to myself, what would I do without their supervision.
Well, yesterday was a fun day. Forum ended quite early to my surprise. It ended at about 1 plus and my bus home would only leave college at 5.45, so I did some work[(sudden realization of the importance of studying)yea right..haha]. After doin for about 2 hours, I went to ssd and caught up with the guys. As usual played a bit of ping pong(really, I don't know why ping pong is like suddenly the in game. Everybody is starting to play it and we all really look super retarded playing the way we play in ping pong) to pass time by. That day my cousin was suppose to come to my house and for the 1st time go clubbing. Awesome ain't it=) haha. Then it got quite boring and my cousin was like "Do we have to wait this long for the bus? Why don;t we ask Denise to fetch us back since she is also fetching Vivien back". Then I'm like "We shouldn;t simply ask people to fetch us back larh. Not nice ok to ask people like that". But my cousin was like too bored so he went and ask Denise. And she was like "Can, but just needa chip in on the petrol=)".
So we left bout 3.30. The thing was that my parents were suppose to leave the house by the afternoon or so I heard. So by leaving at that time, I wasn't sure whether it was a good idea to drop at my house so early and my parents wondering how I got back. So I told Denise to lepak a bit before we go straight to my house. So we went for bubble tea. We asked for the oreo thingy campur dis and campur dat(super crazy). Den Vivien asked for malt oreo + extra oreo and I ordered vanilla malt oreo with extra oreo. So when the drink was ready, the lady passed Vivien's drink 1st and Vivi was like "Cool=)", den when the lady pass me mine, my cup was bigger than Vivi and Vivi went "WHAT? SO UNFAIR LARHHHH. WHY YOURS BIGGER DEN MINE?". How am I suppose to know kan. Sepatutnya same but the lady giv bigger so I'm like okayyyyyyy. Den Vivi was like "Blake, gimme some of yours. The lady sexist. Hahaha".
After bubble tea, we went to Bangsar to walk around. Went to this super cheap stationary shop which is technically a bookshop. The things there are like super cheap and you can't get any cheaper than this(oh and its the place where I bought the canvas board for her collage). So like we bought a lot of crap from there and left. Since we still had so much time, we went to Vivi's house. Denise let me drive to Vivi;s house after persuading her so banyak kali. Because she's so nice. Man I gotta tell you that Vivi's house is quite big. 4 dogs and the house looks like some kinda Zen or Yin Yang thingy with the botanic garden and all. Seriosly dam nice.
After dropping Vivi at her house, we went to my place. I brought Denise to my home and as soon as she stepped in my house, I was like "Denise....you are officially the 1st collage friend who has been in my house". Sad right, no one has come in my house=P..haha.
Basically what I was trying to say is that at least I didn't over use my freedom. But after that, my sis, her bf, my two couz and me went clubbing.
Girls there are kinda sporting. They don't mind dancing in front of the whole crowd, on stage and all. I'm a guy, so I was obviously looking at them la. But I was thinking, some of those girls looked kinda hot, and I would like to get to know them and all, but those are not the girls that I'm really interested in. Like I mean, I would just like to be friends with dem, talk to dem or so, but when it comes to something serious or what, they are not the ones that I look for. Until now, I don't know what girl I'm looking for. I know now that I shouldn't trust someone so easily and that is my weakest point, trusting someone too fast. Every girl that passed by me that day, got me thinking that I wasn't really exposed much to be trusting someone that easily. I kept thinking to myself that I should set some kinda standard when it comes to having a relationship. But the main puzzle which I still haven't figure out yet is what kinda girl do I want.
**
2nd day of freedom and I'm staying at home. I'm suddenly doin chores at home with out any one reminding me. I already did the 3rd badge of washing excluding doin the socks. What has happened to me? Suddenly I'm like good and I realized what I should be doing. One of the reasons why was that I wanted to prove to my parents that I'm responsible to do things even if they are not here to supervise me. I was practically trying to not make them worry and was trying to make them happy.
Well, one of the reasons that I had the sudden realization was that someone helped me in understanding how to concentrate and priorities. And one of the reasons why I asked that person in particular was that I could really express myself to him/her. I have never gotten really serious in front of anyone besides that person in collage before so I thought that that person could understand me and that person did. Usually guys have big egos, even I do. Mine is that I find it hard to accept when people try to teach me. EGO. STUPID EGO. But the thing is, when I'm having problems, that person is the only one I listen to with an open mind. No barriers are up when I hear that person's opinions and when that person tries to help me in suggesting ways to improve, I don't get hot tempered or anything. I'm just super calm and happy when that person gives me advices. That is why I like asking that person. I don't mind showing my fragile side to him/her because I know that him/her would not judge me as she/he knows who I am and that I was what I am at that moment was because of a slight ego.(slight tongue twister..haha).
**
When your alone and noise doesn't seem to be present, thats when your mind is at work. Concentration and determination. Day dreaming and thinking/reflecting is two completely different things. Its when your thinking that your at your most vulnerable state. What you think is the outcome of your feelings. Usually, when your in deep thinking, you tend to get sad and serious. That is because your thinking not only at the present, but also at the past and future. You think of consequences of actions and you think about love and hatred. Just a few hours ago, I was at a mamak alone, eating dinner and I was thinking. I was thinking, why do some people feel sad and serious and angry. And a thought occurred to me that most of the time people are sad and angry because of what they have been thinking. You see, happy thoughts come about when your thinking at the surface. The exterior, the skin, the looks. But when you get deep in, the flesh, the interior, you tend to get more serious. I'm not saying that every time you think deeply you will get angry of what, I'm just saying, most of the time people do get angry.
Sometimes when I think a lot, I tend to miss the feeling of being loved by a girlfriend. The feeling of comfort and the feeling of being wanted by another person. Getting to hold them in your arms and to feel special. A special hug. Technically its just a normal hug that you give to other person you hug, but the feeling changes when you hug someone you really love and you put your heart in that hug and you meant it fully. thats the feeling I miss. That tight squeezed hug, that warm feeling, the rising heart beat, that special someone.
**
The one who doesn't seek attention is the one who is wises. Sometimes I see people craving for attention and other times I see people who have the opportunity to get the attention but they don't want it. Those are the people I look up to, I envy, I admire. I want to be a person who doesn't need the attention. Occasionally I do, I mean its only human to want attention, but you don't have to want it every time. Are you that lack of attention? Why? You want people to notice you? Or you wanna attract someone? I believe that being humble, being nice, will in the end get you where you wanna go. That is one of the reasons why I get to write my opinions and thoughts in this blog because only a handful of people know about this blog. One handful. And thats all I need. Why do we need to post it somewhere so public for everyone to see? I mean I don't get it, but I'm open to receive any reasons. No more ego..so no worries=)..haha
Sorry for the extremely long post. 1st time this long..haha..just wanted to let out some thoughts which was stuck in my mind. Mind bottling. Haha.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Having Faith
Our name is our virtue
**
And it's okay if you have to go away
Oh just remember the telephone works both ways
And if I never ever hear them ring
If nothing else I'll think the bells inside
Have finally found you someone else and that's okay
Cause I'll remember everything you sang
**
And it's okay if you have to go away
Oh just remember the telephone works both ways
And if I never ever hear them ring
If nothing else I'll think the bells inside
Have finally found you someone else and that's okay
Cause I'll remember everything you sang
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Past, Present, Future
Looking back at the times I used to have with different people is something surprising. You might never know when things are about to change. Not long ago, when I re-added a friend of mine, changes were so different that you'll never even imagine in your wildest dreams. Like I said, its always hard to keep to your word, but if you do, everyone will respect you a whole lot more. I have experienced so many things in my life. And 3/4 of it involves me in the experience. I have no idea whether I have changed. If its for good, I'm happy, If its for the other, I'm not proud of it.
**
I don't get it. Why do some people crave for the attention? Do you want people to feel sorry for you and be sad with you and sympathize you? But who am I to speak this way? But I can say, I don't crave for attention, nor do I love the attention. I just go with the flow. The amount of attention given to me is sufficient. I know your sad and all, I do get your feelings, but try keeping it in will you. I'm sorry to say this, but some people thinks your kinda pathetic doing what you did.
**
Damn. I sure can bitch about someone this badly. Like I've said, who am I to speak in this manner. I'm not perfect to comment about someone like this. But if necessary to bitch about someone, at least keep it to yourself, you don't need the whole world to know about it
**
Somethings and some thoughts are meant to be kept away.
**
I don't get it. Why do some people crave for the attention? Do you want people to feel sorry for you and be sad with you and sympathize you? But who am I to speak this way? But I can say, I don't crave for attention, nor do I love the attention. I just go with the flow. The amount of attention given to me is sufficient. I know your sad and all, I do get your feelings, but try keeping it in will you. I'm sorry to say this, but some people thinks your kinda pathetic doing what you did.
**
Damn. I sure can bitch about someone this badly. Like I've said, who am I to speak in this manner. I'm not perfect to comment about someone like this. But if necessary to bitch about someone, at least keep it to yourself, you don't need the whole world to know about it
**
Somethings and some thoughts are meant to be kept away.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Which is Which?
They say, your greatest point is your weakest. Taking good care of others is not only good but also puts you at a great disadvantage. How can your strongest point be your weakest you wonder. How can things go wrong when you care too much. How can disaster strike when your at your peak.
**
Today was great. Even though most of the people did not keep to their word of coming with us to town, maybe they had things to do, or maybe because I changed the date that made them unable to come, or am I just giving them too much slack saying these things? Haha. We'll never know. But I think that everything will turn out good if you have a positive mind. Everything will go accordingly when you keep to your word.
**
Never go against your word. You might not know whether people will think of you differently.
**
Damn, why am I blogging again. Weird gay style thingy. Dude, am i turning ....? Nah
**
Today was great. Even though most of the people did not keep to their word of coming with us to town, maybe they had things to do, or maybe because I changed the date that made them unable to come, or am I just giving them too much slack saying these things? Haha. We'll never know. But I think that everything will turn out good if you have a positive mind. Everything will go accordingly when you keep to your word.
**
Never go against your word. You might not know whether people will think of you differently.
**
Damn, why am I blogging again. Weird gay style thingy. Dude, am i turning ....? Nah
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